Bolivian Food

Bolivian Food

Bolivian food is not an acquired taste, it seems to be a genetic defect. Oily, bland, boring, and all too often gut churning, Bolivian food leaves much to be desired. Stupidly, and out of a desire to be a good guest, I agreed to dinner. The lukewarm rice and oily eggs did not concern me too much, it was the cucumber and tomato 'salad' on the far side of the plate that worried me. I knew the type of market that those veggies likely came from. I tried to make a polite, if not minor dent in the veggies. Unfortunately, I think that those few bites made a much bigger dent in me.

FYI, wonder what I consider an oily egg? These fried eggs were immersed in enough oil to have corn and pea sized oil filled inclusions in the white. Bad, but not gagging bad. Those eggs were in another country...

Wondering about the ketchup and mayo? Mayonnaise seem to be the condiment of choice with almost every meal here. I always am having to ask for fries, burgers, etc. without mayonnaise (sin mayonesa)! After choking down the meal, I had to use my basic Spanish to fend off one stupid request after another that I drink up a mug of coca tea (not cocoa!). For background, coca tea is made directly from coca leaves steeped in hot water. As a result, minute amounts of the same alkaloids that make cocaine so amazing are present in the tea. Normally I wound not care and I would just humor the poorly educated lady by drinking up. However, this time around I wanted to be able to pass a drug upon potentially short notice (a possible Stateside job). So explanation after explanation followed.

Like a parrot who is vocal without any real thought, she said la hoja de coca no es un droja (the coca leaf is not a drug) and then proceeded to tell me all the great things the coca tea would do for me. Hmm, if coca is not a drug (albeit a weak one), how would it do all those things? That point would be lost on her, so I never raised it. I just kept telling her my boss (I do not know how to say potential employer in Spanish!) would not allow it. I think she told me to have my boss contact her. Uh, right.

Sir, could you take up these drug test results with this little crazy lady who lives in mud hut somewhere in the sticks of Bolivia? Yes, that is right, the one who is kinda smelly and serves up great parasites and neighbourly slander (a national pastime in Bolivia). Thanks, I just knew you would trust the opinion of a poorly educated person living in soon-to-be worker's paradise!
Eventually I just said no and watched the cup of tea grow cold before being cleared away hours later. Days later as I write this caption, I am not sure it was better to have sought indoor refuge. Yes, camping would have been nasty, but I likely would not have gotten sick. But, the results of a decision not taken are impossible to really know, so now I am content to carry on with my Cipro.